To my friends -
I'm not going to explain my intentions, but I have a plan. And I think once I tell you the reasoning behind it, you'll be pleased.
Go get pregnant. All of you. Don't have a boyfriend/girlfriend? I don't care! Get knocked up.
I'll explain everything later. At this point, I'm a little confused as to why you are still reading this blog instead of dropping your pants and getting it on.
Get. It. On. Do the nasty. You know what I mean.