Wednesday, May 14, 2008

G.E. just stuck a fork in one of the only things I truly love.

Today, The New York Times reported that General Electric would be selling their appliance unit. My response? Ah, HELL NO! And why do I stand opposed to the sale? Because of one reason and one reason only: One of my favorite parts about the t.v. program 30 Rock, starring Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin, involves a G.E. appliance unit. That's right folks. I'm talking about Microwave Oven Programming.

What will 30 Rock's Jack Donaghy do without the Microwave Oven Programming unit?! THE MICROWAVE OVEN PROGRAMMING UNIT!!!!!!!! I dare say, G.E. has just declared war on Mary Ann Porch. And Mary Ann Porch isn't going down without a fight.

I'm drafting a letter to the bigwigs at G.E. right now. This is what I have so far:

Dear General Electric -

Please do not sell off your appliance unit and destroy the one thing I enjoy out of life - Jack Donaghy's reign over the Microwave Oven Programming Unit on the hit show 30 Rock. You might not be aware, but I'm currently lying on my death bed. I can see the light. But I'm ignoring it because I'm watching 30 Rock on t.v. Ever heard the saying that "Laughter is the best medicine"? Well, that's what my doctor just wrote on my chart. Please don't eff with modern medicine and kill me.

Mary Ann
(1981 to :: a date that is in your hands, General Electric ::)

Readers, feel free to contribute edits/additions to this letter by leaving comments to this post. Let's fight the man!

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